For the Class of 2013
Wisdom For A Good Life
As you
go out
to remake
the world,
I offer
the following
bits of
wisdom—
keep learning,
stay awake
to amazement,
be kind
rather
than right.
And, remember,
while you
might not
agree
with this now,
being loved
is
better
than being
rich. (author unknown)
Go out and set the world on fire!
“Today a new sun rises for me; everything is animated, everything seems to speak to me of my passion, everything invites me to cherish it.” - Anne De Lenclos
This is one of the most beautiful times of the year. The weather is nearly perfect. The summer heat is a hint but not a reality and we live with no immediate concern of hurricane season. On campus, students are content to study under trees, laying on lawns or sitting in our Adirondack chairs. There is an occasional sound of a lawn mower and the physical plant continuing to beautify our campus.
April is a hugely busy time at Loyola. I have this theory that September and April are the two cornerstones of the academic year. In September we launch…classes, programs, seminars, field trips, study abroad, events, athletic contests, art shows, theater productions, music recitals and it goes on and on. It is a robust calendar demonstrating our excitement about the start of a new year. In similar fashion, April is the month equally full…and we can’t possibly let students leave the university without one more concert, one last student awards convocation, one last lecture. Both months represent an immense commitment to making sure that students have their fill of the wonderful world called the academy.
This morning the sun is high, the azaleas are in bloom. The day is full of promise. At noon our athletic department hosts the annual golf tournament fundraiser at Audubon Park; the French Quarter fest is in full swing; clubs and organizations are throwing a crawfish bash and by Sundayall attention will be on studying for finals.
As for me, I am grateful this morning for the privilege working at a university brings; I can’t wait for the joy of May graduation.
Loyola’s Vice President of Student Affairs M.L. “Cissy” Petty, Ph.D., was honored by the Jesuit Association of Student Personnel Administrators with the Ignatian Medal for Outstanding Service at its annual conference in Orlando, Fla., March 16. The award, established in 1997, is conferred on individuals who have truly distinguished themselves by the breadth and depth of service they have given to the association or for the significant influence they have had on JASPA's direction, programs and services.
Petty was elected as JASPA’s president in 2011 and has been serving in that role since March 2012. According to her award nominators, JASPA has made significant strides over the past two years under Petty’s leadership in reforming its planning processes, developing strategic goals for the organization and expanding the organization’s professional leadership base.
“This work was entirely inspired by Cissy’s dedication and vision and would not have been accomplished without her. Cissy is indeed an example of all that is right with student affairs leadership,” according to her nominators.
JASPA was founded in 1954 as part of the AJCU, and its members represent the 28 Jesuit colleges and universities in the U.S. and affiliate members from other institutions. The primary purpose of the Jesuit Association of Student Personnel Administrators is to discuss, identify, and promote principles and practices applicable in the area of student affairs in Jesuit colleges and universities.
News reports, newspapers, Twitter and Facebook are filled with questions regarding Jorge Mario Bergoglio. The world is curious about the new leader of the Catholic Church. What does his selection mean for the church and her followers? What leadership characteristics will Pope Francis I bring to his elevated role as the Vicar of Christ on earth? Many are curious about how his Jesuit education will inform his papacy.
I invite you to enjoy this article, written by Giula Belardelli with the Huffington Post Italy:
Jesuit Pope: How Francis Will Proceed As First Pontiff From Society Of Jesus
Jorge Mario Bergoglio, 76, is not only the first South American pope in the history of the Church, but he is also the first Jesuit pope and the only member of the Society of Jesus present in the College of Cardinals, which voted to select Joseph Ratzinger's successor. Never before has a Jesuit been tasked with leading the Church, likely because the religious order founded by Ignatius of Loyola in 1534 was centered around a figure who -- at least in the collective imagination -- could be seen as clashing with the Holy Father: the Superior General, also known as the Father General or, more commonly, the Black Pope.
We interviewed Father Giovanni La Manna, a Jesuit and the president of Centro Astalli, the Italian branch of the Jesuit Refugee Service. He explained to us why he does not believe clashes will occur between the two religious authorities, thanks to the "the new pope's spiritual and human intelligence," which will avoid all forms of conflict with the Father General. And as for the name chosen by the new pope --Francis -- the Jesuit has no doubts: it is an homage to St. Francisco de Jasso Azpilcueta Atondo y Aznares de Javier, better known as St. Francis Xavier, one of the first blessed witnesses of the Society of Jesus.
Jesuits must obey not only the pope, but also the Father General -- the so-called Black Pope -- who is currently Adolfo Nicolás. How will they relate to these two figures?
I believe that the new pope is an exceptional person, in both a spiritual and a human sense, and that he will have the maturity to avoid any type of conflict. As for the mission of Jesuits, they take a vow which goes beyond obedience: the so-called "fourth vow of obedience to the pope." Based on this vow, the pope can ask Jesuits to undertake a mission at any moment, and Jesuits are bound to obey him, regardless of the Father General's wishes. But I am certain that this won't happen: Francis I will not create conflicts between obeying the Father General and His Holiness.
What is the significance of the first Jesuit pope for the Church's history?
It is certainly something new, and like all new things it will bring joy and curiosity among the faithful. Personally, I am very happy and curious to see how a Jesuit pope will move forward.
From your perspective, will there also be some recognition of your order?
The new pope is a person who received a Jesuit education, and those who have been Jesuits for years cannot erase their origins. His education influenced the way he conducted himself as the Archbishop of Buenos Aires; a man is unlikely to forget that which has shaped him. The fact that he is a Jesuit will influence the way he serves the Church. We have already had a taste of this in tonight's greeting -- in his request that the faithful pray for him even before blessing him. Just as the pope blesses the people of the Church, Francis I asked his people to bless and pray for him.
What does his name mean? Do you think he chose it in reference to St. Francis and his vow of poverty?
Since His Holiness has a Jesuit history, I very much think that he chose it with St. Francis Xavier in mind (San Francisco de Jasso Azpilcueta Atondo y Aznares de Javier), one of the first missionaries who tried to evangelize in new lands. I believe that the choice is rooted in His Holiness' own history and therefore in that of the Jesuits.
Thinking and living as a Jesuit, I immediately thought of this reference to our Francis Xavier, a important saint for Jesuits and one of the first blessed witnesses of the Society of Jesus, who spent his entire life on his mission of evangelization. I am sure that this name rings in the spirit of His Holiness.
What kind of pope will Frances I be? Will he offer a break from the past, or continuity?
He will certainly keep the path of his predecessors in mind. But he will assign priorities in his own way, and the fact that he is a Jesuit will affect how he identifies these priorities. Considering the name he has chosen, he will surely be a man committed to the New Evangelization in the Year of Faith.
He will guide the Church with the attention of someone looking at the world from another point of view -- in his case, from Argentina. And in that way he will help bring fresh air and a review of priorities to the universal Church. All of this brings nothing but excitement and enthusiasm to the Church. Returning again to his first speech as pope: By asking the faithful to bless him, he began a dialogue -- a new reciprocal relationship. It is not a one-way speech, but one which bespeaks a sense of shared reality.
(Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/14/jesuit-pope-how-francis-will-proceed-as-first-pontiff-from-society-of-jesus_n_2874782.html?utm_hp_ref=religion#slide=2218753)
It's clear that both surprise and joy erupted on the announcement that a Jesuit had been named the Holy Father.
In New Orleans, the shortest month of the year has some amazing moments! How many places in the country does work stop for an entire week of revelry? A week dedicated purely to returning to childlikeness. I know of absolutely nowhere, at 50+, you get away with wearing a tutu and a hot pink wig. Not that I did this, but many of my friends did.
It’s an interesting cultural phenomenon called Mardi Gras. As a member of one of the largest all women’s krewes, Carnival is embedded in my NOLA experience. As much as I try and resist bead clamoring, I go home many evenings wondering why my back hurts. Is it the jumping up and down screaming, me, me, me…or more likely that I am wearing every big bead thrown in my direction. To the dismay of my friends, I have been known to snatch beads out of thin air. You have to be incredibly strategic as you move along St. Charles with the floats. I practice my Strengths Quest profile along the parade route.
• Strategic: Sidewalk or Neutral Ground? Always looking for alternative routes while snaking through the crowd
• Maximizer : Who can help me get the best beads? Make sure to share the bounty!
• Activator: Keep up with the ACTION, which means hydrate often; enlist assistance with guarding your stake along the route!
• Ideation: Remain fascinated by folks sharing in the Mardi Gras tradition. Pay careful attention not to jostle a ladder.
• Connectedness: Every event has a reason and Mardi Gras is a celebration of all that is distinctively NOLA.
Another season of Carnival is over and we begin to look forward to spring renewal; a wonderful move from Fat Tuesday to Ash Wednesday. This is a time for reflection on the gifts we’ve been given and the gifts we can give to one another. I do not think of this as so much a time of sacrifice, but a time of cleansing mind, body and spirit. May your Lenten season be a time of reflection, thanksgiving and love.
As I was thinking about the new year I ran across this outstanding article. Not one for making resolutions, I do use this reflective time to think about commitments. To me making a commitment to myself and others actually is about trust and respect. Commitments are about integrity. Commitments made reflect both character and competence...which makes keeping them all the more important.
The attached link, brings a distinctive flavor to "new year" dissolutions! The author asks the question "What will you stop doing?" Very provocative and cheers to 2013. Enjoy!
The following article originally appeared in USA Today on January 3, 2003, and is written by Jim Collins.
Each time the New Year rolls around and I sit down to do my annual resolutions, I reflect back to a lesson taught me by a remarkable teacher. In my mid-20s, I took a course on creativity and innovation from Rochelle Myers and Michael Ray at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, and I kept in touch with them after I graduated.
One day, Rochelle pointed to my ferocious work pace and said, "I notice, Jim, that you are a rather undisciplined person."
I was stunned and confused. After all, I was the type of person who carefully laid out my BHAGs (big hairy audacious goals), top three objectives and priority activities at the start of each New Year. I prided myself on the ability to work relentlessly toward those objectives, applying the energy I'd inherited from my prairie-stock grandmother.
"Your genetic energy level enables your lack of discipline," Rochelle continued. "Instead of leading a disciplined life, you lead a busy life."
She then gave me what I came to call the 20-10 assignment. It goes like this: Suppose you woke up tomorrow and received two phone calls. The first phone call tells you that you have inherited $20 million, no strings attached. The second tells you that you have an incurable and terminal disease, and you have no more than 10 years to live. What would you do differently, and, in particular, what would you stop doing?
That assignment became a turning point in my life, and the "stop doing" list became an enduring cornerstone of my annual New Year resolutions — a mechanism for disciplined thought about how to allocate the most precious of all resources: time.
Rochelle's challenge forced me to see that I'd been plenty energetic, but on the wrong things. Indeed, I was on entirely the wrong path. After graduate school, I'd taken a job at Hewlett-Packard. I loved the company, but hated the job. Rochelle's assignment helped me to see I was cut out to be a professor, a researcher, a teacher — not a businessman — and I needed to make a right-angle turn. I had to stop doing my career, so that I could find my real work. I quit HP, migrated to the Stanford Business School faculty and eventually became — with some remarkable good luck along the way — a self-employed professor, happily toiling away on my research and writing.
Rochelle's lesson came back to me a number of years later while puzzling over the research data on 11 companies that turned themselves from mediocrity to excellence, from good to great. In cataloguing the key steps that ignited the transformations, my research team and I were struck by how many of the big decisions were not what to do, but what to stop doing.
In perhaps the most famous case, Darwin Smith of Kimberly-Clark — a man who had prevailed over throat cancer — said one day to his wife: "I learned something from my cancer. If you have a cancer in your arm, you've got to have the guts to cut off your own arm. I've made a decision: We're going to sell the mills."
At the time, Kimberly-Clark had the bulk of its revenues in the traditional paper business. But Smith began asking three important questions: Are we passionate about the paper business? Can we be the best in the world at it? Does the paper business best drive our economic engine?
The answers came up: no, no and no.
And so, Smith made the decision to stop doing the paper business — to sell off 100 years of corporate history — and throw all the resulting resources into the consumer business (building brands such as Kleenex), which came up yes, yes and yes to the same questions.
The start of the New Year is a perfect time to start a stop doing list and to make this the cornerstone of your New Year resolutions, be it for your company, your family or yourself. It also is a perfect time to clarify your three circles, mirroring at a personal level the three questions asked by Smith:
1) What are you deeply passionate about?
2) What are you are genetically encoded for — what activities do you feel just "made to do"?
3) What makes economic sense — what can you make a living at?Those fortunate enough to find or create a practical intersection of the three circles have the basis for a great work life.
Think of the three circles as a personal guidance mechanism. As you navigate the twists and turns of a chaotic world, it acts like a compass. Am I on target? Do I need to adjust left, up, down, right? If you make an inventory of your activities today, what percentage of your time falls outside the three circles?
If it is more than 50%, then the stop doing list might be your most important tool. The question is: Will you accept good as good enough, or do you have the courage to sell the mills?
Looking back, I now see Rochelle Myers as one of the few people I've known to lead a great life, while doing truly great work. This stemmed largely from her remarkable simplicity. A simple home. A simple schedule. A simple frame for her work.
Rochelle spoke to me repeatedly about the idea of "making your life a creative work of art." A great piece of art is composed not just of what is in the final piece, but equally important, what is not. It is the discipline to discard what does not fit — to cut out what might have already cost days or even years of effort — that distinguishes the truly exceptional artist and marks the ideal piece of work, be it a symphony, a novel, a painting, a company or, most important of all, a life.
Jim Collins is author of Good to Great and co-author of Built to Last.
Original post found here: www.jimcollins.com/article_topics/articles/best-new-years.html
The latest challenge floating around Facebook is posting each day--through the month of November--what you are thankful for in your life. This challenge seemed easy enough; although I didn’t see it until November 3, so I had some catching up to do. It wasn’t hard and it doesn’t have to be grand.
In the first few days I was thankful for time with friends, a drive to the coast, and waking up early, coffee in bed, pups sleeping and a stack of holiday catalogs. This morning was different. I thought about Thanksgiving as celebrating the harvest. It reminded me that we often reap what we sow; to everything there is a season, and quickly the seasons change.
Thanksgiving is a time of reflection; a time when friends and family gather and share traditions. My thoughts often wander to folks far away, in distance and heart, and I flat out miss them. I wish for all, a full harvest. In the midst of a holiday, it may be easy to be grateful for 30 days; it’s much harder to pull it off as a way of living.
Thirty days hath September, April, June, and November. All the rest have thirty-one, Excepting February alone, And that has twenty-eight days clear, And twenty-nine in each leap year, days become months and the seasons pass.
Cissy and Liz
It took years for me to recognize the gift next to me. Almost three years separating us and different from the start; I didn’t much think of her as a friend growing up. Today, I am grateful for a sister, who has known my best and worse self. In our early 30’s, with both parents having died, we chose to be family and friends. She is proud of me; she is a fierce protector, and cheerleader. We have worked on our sister-bond for 20 years. We began to appreciate our similarities and our differences; live and let live! What made us distant as children is a very faint memory. We choose to celebrate successes and joys, comfort one another during sad times, and offer each other a measure of grace.
What have I discovered? The harvest is ready when you are ready.
“I Need A Launching Pad. I Have So Many Helicopter Parents.” - Dean, Selective Eastern College
October is national book month and I confess to loving real books, the ones made with paper and ink and binding. Perhaps some may think I’m old fashioned craving paper as I do, and yes if you call me out on paper-love I am likely to respond to you on my iPad or Blackberry in less than 30 minutes.
I am digitally connected and love scanning Facebook, Twitter and occasionally get side tracked by Pinterest. Connected and scanning on-line are very different than getting lost reading a book. It’s fair to say that I do read on my Kindle but I tend to enjoy the hard back book between my hands most. My Kindle is a part of every trip; I like carrying my library with me. But at home, I like seeing my old friends on the shelf; books that have transformed my ideas about spirituality and relationships; books that illustrate the difficulties of the damned game called golf.
I also like underlining and folding pages. I like flipping manually back to a page and re-reading a paragraph without hitting a back or refresh button. Sometimes I just want to sit with an author’s thought without a digital screen growing dark.
Two weeks ago a book I’d been waiting for arrived by snail mail. I opened the package and the new book slipped out. As I opened it I heard the spine of the book crack and could smell the pages. It’s akin to walking across your yard after the first snow or like being the first one to open the NY Times saving the travel section for last. There is an absolute freshness to the written word on paper.
I am just beginning to read “Generation On A Tightrope: A Portrait of Today’s College Student” written by Arthur Levine and Diane R. Dean. Arthur Levine, author of two previous books about college students: “When Dreams and Hero’s Died (1980) and When Hope and Fear Collide (1998), is currently the president of the Woodrow Wilson Foundation and retired as President Emeritus of Columbia Teacher’s College. Dr. Levine has been profiling colleges students based on significant research for over 30 years. His work was important to me during both my master’s and doctoral work. His co-author, Diane R. Dean is the current associate professor of higher education policy and administration at Illinois State University.
In the preface of the book Levine and Dean write the following
“This is a portrait of a generation on a tightrope. Today’s college students are struggling to maintain their balance as they attempt to cross the gulf between their dreams and the diminished realities of the world in which they live. They are seeking security but live in an age of profound and unceasing change. They desperately want the economic opportunity their parents enjoyed but are coming of age during a deep recession with reduced career prospects. They want to believe in the American Dream and are optimistic about their personal futures but they are pessimistic about the future of the country. They want to become autonomous grown-ups but seem more dependent on their parents and adults around them than any modern generation. They want intimacy—a partner and a family – but they are isolated, weak in face-to-face communication skills and live in a hook-up culture. They want to play by the rules but they don’t know the rules and the rules are in flux because of the dramatic changes in our economy, the rise of new technologies, the condition of poor public and private institutions, and a world growing flatter. They want to live in an Internet world, a digitally connected globe but the adults and social institutions around them are analog or digital immigrants, including their blackboard universities.
This is a generation that thinks itself as global citizens but knows little about the world and acts locally. It is the most diverse generation in collegiate history with the strongest relationships between races but they have limited interest in talking about race or reaching across political or generational divides.
This is a story about how we help today’s undergraduates cross the abyss that threatens to dissolve and swallow them, and how we can work with them to ensure that they will help us all to create the diverse global, digital information economy of the twenty-first century.”
So the introduction is done, and now it’s time for me to turn the page.
What’s on your reading list?
We began watching this storm as it was sputtering to existence off the coast of Africa. The university subscribes to this sophisticated weather alert system geared towards tropical developments called “Impact Weather.” It is the same weather alert system deployed by the oil companies for monitoring conditions on the rigs; Tulane also uses this advance tracking system.
There was a palatable sigh of relief when it appeared on Thursday, August 23 that the storm would likely impact either Miami or Tampa Bay; not that we wished ill to our sister cities. As the storm shifted slightly on Friday, August 24 it began to look as if the northeast coast of Florida would be Isaac’s target. Since we were at the end of “Welcome Week” and the start of classes, we were grateful that New Orleans was not in the “cone of uncertainty.” Well, as storms go Isaac shifted again and by Saturday, August, 25 Mobile was beginning to be part of the “spaghetti” map the weather folks are fond of putting up on the TV screen.
The entire time that Isaac was moving from Africa to the gulf area our Emergency Management Team, headed by Stephen Murphy was acutely aware of Isaac’s patterns. By Sunday, August, 26 and early Monday, August, 27 Isaac took a tack similar to the old saying, “go West, young man.” The president along with the Emergency Management Team decided that the category 1 storm did not deem an evacuation necessary, the university suspended operations, and we “sheltered 600 students in place.”
Eventually on Tuesday, August 28 we lost electricity; powered by diesel fuel, the generated safety lighting came on, but no AC, and no true ability to cook. While it was hot, we were prepared. Under the leadership of Craig Beebe, the residential life team, along with our partner, Sodexo fed residents seamlessly the entire week. During the storm, several staff members from Athletics & Wellness arrived to open the gym for students so they could exercise by day light. During the evening hours, co-curricular and residential life staff provided activities for residents, including an outstanding impromptu talent show in Carrolton Hall.
I spent from Tuesday to Friday morning at Loyola, sleeping in my office. The President stayed on campus as well, and it was good to be a part of normalizing operations as much as possible. Although there are some things we can and should improve upon, I was pleased with how the student affairs team worked well with LUPD and the physical plant staff. We realize that you can never communicate enough and promise to improve on that with all of our constituents.
Hurricane Isaac was a category 1 storm with near Katrina like flooding in places like Plaquemines Parish. These folks suffered losing homes, belongings, in some cases everything but memories. While Isaac hovered over Loyola dumping 24” of rain, and many were without electricity for almost a week; we did not suffer nearly like our neighbors. We lost our comfort zone. We were safe. We had food and shelter. We were hot but make no mistake we were fortunate.
To mark the storm we tried to get t-shirts made; “I survived Hurricane Isaac” seemed too dramatic. One colleague suggested we use the like-ness of Isaac Hayes; instead I decided to cull his song lyrics. So here is our nod to Hurricane Isaac, categorically speaking, of course.
“Stormy Monday Blues” lyrics
They call it stormy Monday, but Tuesday’s just as bad
They call it stormy Monday, but Tuesday’s just as bad
Wednesday’s worse, and Thursday’s also sad
Yes, the eagle flies on Friday, and Saturday I go out to
play; Sunday I go to church, then I kneel down and pray
Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy on me
Lord have mercy, my heart’s in misery
Crazy about my AC, yes, send it back to me.
- Isaac Hayes, with a slight variation
This summer I traveled alone. This summer I drove 1463 miles RT to Bella Vista, Arkansas from New Orleans, LA. I listened to Kelly Clarkson belt out “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stand taller, and doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone,” and, I laughed at church signs along the way. One in particular caught my eye; “Beware, Satan is on the loose.” Needless to say, I did not stop for coffee; I just don’t need that kind of trouble!
Traveling alone, just the sound of it rings with strength, freedom, certainly solitude and yes, it has a twinge or ache of sadness. There is something of value being alone, sifting and searching your heart; time to revel in great memories and conjure up new adventures. Traveling alone is my time to be reflective and mindful.
I think about the person I’ve become, the things I am most proud of, and the moments I wish I could have back but cannot. I vow to do and be better; working against the “should, could, would” track that plays in my mind. Pema Chodren says, “Don’t underestimate the things in your life that bring you happiness,” and that’s where I land, deeply grateful for so much.
With each passing mile, I feel gratitude for the life and love I’ve been given. I marvel at the many opportunities for passionate, meaningful work; the good health I celebrate; the love of a sister and friends that are my family. I run through a litany of prayers for all those that are at my heart center.
Think about the paths you’ve taken this summer, the twists and turns in life’s highway. Be grateful for where you’ve landed, no matter what the
circumstance… from joy to sorrow. You can be certain the moment that is unfolding is the lesson you most need to learn.
It’s true I traveled alone this summer, but far away from loneliness.
In New Orleans when we love something or someone or feel a large measure of gratitude we use the phrase: All Hail. So today, after the month long celebration of women SSAOs I’d like to collectively say: All Hail, Niki Rudolph.
Her involvement in the on-line and IRL communities of WLSALT, SAwomenlead, and the Women’s Leadership Insititute (WLI) are extraordinary. True to the mission, Niki has been immersed in supporting, affirming, lifting and transforming.
Have you been to Niki’s blog, “The Courage For Mine?” I invite you to take a good, long look. www.nikirudolph.com What you’ll find is a perfect example of intent and behavior matching; in other words, why it is so easy to trust Niki.
She opens her blog with Ayn Rand’s quote, “Show me your achievement – and the knowledge will give me courage for mine.” Beautiful! The quote highlights perfectly why Niki would take on the daunting task of celebrating 31 Senior Student Affairs Officers. She did it because she thoughtfully balances the wonderful skill of recognizing and celebrating others strengths and talents. Niki takes joy in seeing others passion and fire for their work; and enjoys igniting that and developing it in others.
Niki exudes a burning bright love of learning. Yes, she loves books, and too, she is infectious with her inquisitive nature. She listens well; she seeks opinions, rolls them around and returns them to the sender for more introspection. She’s an idea gal, a gatherer of sorts, a keen observer on all things student affairs and stuff that holds dreams and life time goals. If you know Niki, you know how large a heart she has, so it’s no surprise it can hold both the keen and important.
Niki is flat out fun. Her smile invites you to want to know her better. The invitation exists because as she says, the more she learns of others well-doing and well- being; the more courage it gives her to live her best self.
Igniting passion for her profession, the joy she gets from lighting up student engagement suggests that Niki Rudolph has found “the space between the logs.”
How grateful we are for her burning love of life and learning. This one’s for you, Niki with thanksgiving!
Fire
What makes a fire burn
in space between the logs,
a breathing space.
Too much of a good thing,
too many logs
packed into tight
can douse the flames
almost as surely
as a pail of water would.
So building fires
requires attention
to the spaces in between,
as much as to the wood.
When we are able to build
open spaces
in the same way
we have learned
to pile on the logs,
then we can come to see how
it is fuel, and absence of fuel
together, that makes fire possible.
We only need to lay a log
lightly from time to time.
A fire
grows
simply because the space is there,
with openings
in which the flame
that knows just how it wants to burn
can find its way.
-Judy Brown
Once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.
--Margery Williams
Several years ago, I received The Velveteen Rabbit as a Christmas gift. It has long been a favorite of mine and especially poignant on the topic of authenticity or being Real. If you are a fan of the book as well, you’ll remember the conversations between The Velveteen Rabbit and the Old Skin Horse. One particular conversation about being Real went like this:
“Real isn’t how you are made. It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
Old Skin Horse understands transformational love. He explains to The Velveteen Rabbit that real love encompasses real experiences (both good and bad) over real time. Old Skin Horse goes on to share:
“Generally by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real, you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
Becoming Real is hard work. Becoming Real means that it isn’t all play time. Becoming Real involves facing loss, hardships, and challenges, and owning our imperfections. Becoming Real is no easy game; it is a way of growing into our authentic selves.
Like Rabbit most of us want to know if becoming Real hurts.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.” Rabbit asks, “Does it happen all at once, like being wound up, or bit by bit?” “It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept.
“I suppose you are real?” said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.
But the Skin Horse only smiled.
Here’s to our journey of being Real together.
Dr. Brené Brown went viral! Her Ted talk on Vulnerability is worth the 20 minutes and 20 seconds it takes to watch, I promise you. There are few times that a youtube video actually can be life changing. This is one of those times.
Dr. Brown’s background is as a researcher, writer, and professor. Her discipline is social work, her passion is studying a concept she calls “wholeheartedness.” Check out what close to a 100,000 folks have witnessed to date. Here’s the link.
Sounds like Dr. Brown could work in Jesuit higher education. She has a keen understanding of cura personalis; the importance of educating the whole person. Dr. Brown’s research focuses on shame and fear, two concepts that usually end conversations rather than begin them. After reviewing some of her work, it’s clear that her interest in wholeheartedness is important in re-visiting how we use/teach student development theory. In her seven year research quest, Dr. Brene Brown simply proposed two questions:
I suggest this is a perfect way to understand Jesuit student leadership education.
I had the privilege last night of welcoming student leaders, faculty, and staff to the 29th Annual Student Leadership Awards ceremony. It was magnificent to look out at the audience and see the current and future change agents among us! Truly the nominated student leaders live out the values of Loyola everyday. We highlight these values: Dignity, Excellence, Compassion, Inclusiveness, and Wholeness on the walls of the Danna Student Center. These words epitomize the intentions and behaviors of the students we honored last night; both on campus with their organizations and programs; and too, off campus in service to others.
When I looked out over the audience last night, I was struck by wonderful “mix” of students—from all corners of the campus. It’s clear that everyone present last night had a story to tell about where they came from; where they are; and where their hopes and dreams are found.
Dr. Brown describes it this way: Our lives are a collection of stories—truths about who we are, what we believe, what we come from, how we struggle, and how we are strong. When we can let go of what people think, and own our story, we gain access to our worthiness—the feeling that we are enough just as we are, and that we are worthy of love and belonging.
Student leaders…give yourselves a standing ovation!
For more information on Dr. Brown’s DVD, The Hustle for Worthiness, and her other works, visit her website.
A tradition for many hundreds of years, May Day Baskets are popular among children and meant to demonstrate the joy of gift giving.
The history of May Day dates back to pre-Christian Europe as a tribute to Flora, the Roman goddess of flowers. Flower -centric festivals are customary still today. Often popular among children, the first day of May has slowly evolved into a celebration of giving, once referred to as “bringing in the May.”
The tradition of May Day begins with a basket or container brimming with flowers and small gifts. The May Day basket is quietly and secretly placed on the doorstep of a neighbor or loved one, demonstrating the gift of giving without receiving. (Victorian Magazine)
When I was young, I left flowers on the door step of my home, rang the door bell and then ran away. When I was older, I sent flowers to my mom every May 1. She’s no longer with me, but when I see fresh flowers on May 1 I am instantly transported to that 6 year old, eager self that only wanted to surprise her.
Today, a friend sent me flowers…out of the blue…and I was grateful! Make someone’s day…
On March 12 – 13, 2011, I attended the annual spring conference for the Jesuit Association of Student Professional Administrators (JASPA), hosted by Saint Joseph’s University. Members of JASPA represent the 28 Jesuit colleges and universities in the United States and also include affiliate members from other institutions. JASPA’s goal is to work to promote the mission of Jesuit higher education.
Each year, JASPA members honor campus leaders, programs, and initiatives for contributions and influence to Jesuit higher education. I am proud to announce that during the conference the 2011 Ignatian Medal for an Outstanding Campus Program was awarded to Loyola University New Orleans in recognition of our program, the Ignatius Loyola Institute for Values Education (iLIVE).
The Ignatian Medal for an Outstanding Campus Program is the only Ignatian Medal awarded to an institution rather than to an individual person. Student Affairs work uses programs and services as the tools to meet students’ needs and to resolve conditions on campus which impede the educational process. Programming is a creative process, one which requires a multiplicity of skills and talents. Good programs are often shared among campuses, and certain programs stand out from all others for their creativity, focus, adaptability to different campus environments, and for their proven effectiveness.
The iLIVE program provides each undergraduate student strategic co-curricular experiences and opportunities to discover, develop, and apply principles for building ethical and meaningful lives. iLIVE gives students ways in which to learn and live the values of Loyola University New Orleans, enhance academic commitments, and transition into lives of service to others. Formed by Jesuit and Catholic values, iLIVE sponsors programs and activities encouraging the processes of reflection and discernment, which leads students to define their personal ethical code. Activities include intentional exposure to wellness initiatives; speaker and lecture series on current issues and leadership topics; career discernment; commitment to diversity; character development; and service.
Of course, institutions don’t create programs; people do. The honor of this award belongs to the many Student Affairs professionals at Loyola who have worked during the past four years to make iLIVE a success.
